What doesn't work
Most sellers in this space will not tell you this. I would rather you know before you spend £400 than find out afterwards.
A de-Googled phone is a genuine upgrade to your privacy and your security. It is not magic, and there are things it cannot do. Here is the complete, honest list.
Tap-to-pay is gone
Google Wallet does not work, and there is no workaround. Your physical card works exactly as before, and some banks have their own contactless payment inside their app — but assume you will be tapping a card, not a phone.
A small number of banking apps refuse to run
Most work fine. A few check whether your phone runs Google-certified software and will not open if it does not. Tell me your bank before you order and I will check it. Every bank I know of also has a full website that works perfectly in the browser.
Your network still knows where you are
This is worth understanding clearly. Any phone connected to a mobile network tells that network which mast it is near. That is how phone calls physically work, and no operating system on earth changes it. Your mobile provider still has that data. What changes is that Google no longer does.
Smartwatches are unreliable
Pixel Watch and Wear OS devices depend on Google software in ways that do not work well here. Garmin works well. So do most fitness bands. If you rely on a Wear OS watch, tell me and we will talk about it first.
Some Google conveniences disappear
Google Photos' "show me pictures of my dog at the beach" search is genuinely excellent and you will miss it. There are good alternatives, but be honest with yourself about this one. Google Assistant, Call Screening and a few Pixel-exclusive features also go.
Group chats with iPhone friends get worse
RCS messaging runs through Google. Without it, messages to iPhone users fall back to standard SMS — which they largely did anyway. The real answer is moving the people you actually talk to onto Signal, which I will help you do.
Nobody is backing up your phone any more
This is the point, and it is also a genuine responsibility. I will set up a backup system for you and show you how it works. But from then on it is yours to maintain.
You will need to learn a few new things
Not many. But some. That is what the 1-on-1 sessions are for, and why I answer emails personally rather than handing you a box and disappearing.
Still interested?
Most people are — because none of the above is as significant as being tracked every minute of every day. But now you are choosing with your eyes open, which is the whole idea.
Want proof rather than promises? See how to verify your phone.